Review of 2-12-2000 episode (MD-516; some spoilers)

This review can also be found at:

        http://www.nic0lesullivan.org/md516.txt

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Opening Segment: Pat Kilbane's obsequious Andy Kessler is back to
welcome Regis Philbin (himself) to the show. Kilbane delivers Kessler's
lines in a monotone, deadpan voice not unlike that of Steven Wright.
He doesn't hesitate to kiss up to Philbin, declaring the most pedestrian
badinage to be "the funniest thing I've ever heard." [And it is somewhat
funny the way the "Who Wants to Be a Millionaire" incidental music plays
everytime they open the door. This was probably not the best opening
segment they've done this year, but it's safe to say there have been
at least half a dozen pretty lame show openings, and this easily vaults
past those ones, and probably a few others, making this one of the
funnier (and more original) show openings this season.

Reality Check: The two corpulent African-American women (Aries Spears,
Debra Wilson) are back to talk with designer Tommy Hilfiger (Pat Kilbane);
they immediately express disapproval of his new line of clothes for
overweight women, and when Hilfiger fires back with some insults of
his own, they subject him to a "reality check" in which suggest his
obsolence and make fun of his teeth. They also make fun of Pokemon
("sounds like a gay Jamaican porn"). This segment didn't do much for
me, although Hilfiger is an exemplary target for parody (Mad Magazine
ran an ad parody of "Tommy Hifigure" two years ago, and of course
there was the Beavis and Butt-head t-shirt, "Tommy, Pull My Finger").
Still, good for a laugh or two.

Regis Philbin #2: Dixon (Will Sasso) meets with Philbin to come up
with a sketch idea. Philbin doesn't want to do a sketch parody of
"Who Wants to Be a Millionaire," but the only ideas that Dixon came
up with were parodies of "Millionaire." When Philbin is adamant that
he won't do such a parody, Dixon is almost apoplectic, and leaves the
room in a fit of pique. This is pretty much a retread of a similar
segment with Ilena Douglas from earlier on in the season; this one
was not quite as funny, although I liked how Dixon always wears a
T-shirt with a stupid catch phrase on it (this time, it says "I'M THE
BEST"). It could have been better, but this was OK.

Reading Caboose: Everyone's favorite crackpot journalists (Michael
McDonald, Mo Collins) tell us about the plot to kill Marylin Monroe
(they claim the CIA did it because Monroe knew millitary secrets).
They also claim that Vince Foster was killed by the Clintons (in
the interests of equal time, I suppose they surmised it was time
to throw in a crackpot right-wing conspiracy theory). David James
Elliot appears as author Bob Dempsey, who helps them elaborate on
these theories. At first I wasn't that impressed by this segment, but
I appreciated it somewhat more on repeated viewing - shattering
the seeming innocence of a children's reading show on public television
by holding up a graphical depiction of Marylin Monroe in bed with
the Kennedys does have value as humor. [Brings back fond memories
of the obscene Peanuts comic strip showing Charlie Brown sporting an
erection. R.I.P. Charles Schultz.] There is the concern that they
will overutilize this segment as they have with many other recurring
segments (they had this segment two weeks ago and they're going to
use it again in two weeks), but I'd rather have this segment every
other week than Stuart. The segment was at least as good as the
previous "Reading Caboose" segment.

Regis Philbin #3: Philbin complains to Kessler about Dixon pitching
the "Millionaire" sketch. There wasn't much to get excited about
here - it's mainly a lead-in for the next sketch - but we do get
a virtually flawless performance by Kilbane as Kessler.

Who Wants to Be the President: Regis Philbin hosts a parody of "Who
Wants to Be a Millionaire." The contestants are Al Gore (Pat Kilbane),
Alan Keyes (Aries Spears) and Jesse Ventura (Will Sasso). Odd that
they couldn't get anyone to play George W. Bush, given that he is the
major Republican candidate, yet two fringe candidates, Keyes and Ventura,
are represented here. Still, Philbin gets to make some choice insults
at the expense of the three politicians, especially Gore. [Gore: "Ask
me anything. I'm the brains of the Clinton administration." Philbin:
"Atta boy. Aim low."] This was easily the centerpiece and high point of
this episode. Seeing Ventura there is funny, especially with all the
recent infighting in the Reform Party. As for the Alan Keyes impression,
there isn't much depth to it - e.g., we don't get a sense of his political
views, or of the fact that he's one of the few political candidates
this year who is a full-fledged intellectual - but the mannerisms of
Keyes, especially his circumlocution, are captured. The Al Gore impression
is good as well. And I almost forgot to mention the hilarity of Al
Gore, not knowing that Moesha is NOT a character on "Friends," using one
of his lifelines to call Alan Keyes, who, misunderstanding Gore, hands
the phone back to Al Gore (when Gore said "it's Al Gore," Keyes thought
he wanted to talk to Al Gore, and gave the phone to Gore, making him
look very stupid indeed).

Philbin #4: Kessler returns, proving he is clueless by saying that Philbin
won't have to do a "Millionaire" sketch, even though he just did. Again
a good performance by Kilbane as Kessler; Philbin wasn't bad either.

Another 7-Up commercial with Orlando Jones, and then...

Stuart at the Pet Shop: The character Stuart (played by Michael McDonald) has
not defiled "Mad TV" in some time (since before Christmas, I think).
Optimists may have thought he was gone for good, not knowing that like
a bad penny, he would turn up again. He's in a pet store (run by Alex
Borstein) to buy a puppy; he promptly eats some dog food, and attacks
a man (Nelson Ascencio, in his second gig on "Mad TV") who is buying
a feeder rat for his pet boa constrictor. Then they buy the rat, but
not before Stuart puts the rat on his mother's (Mo Collins) head. As
with most Stuart sketches, I did not find this amusing - this character
is really starting to grate me (also, this sketch went on way too long -
but at least we weren't subjected to seeing Michael McDonald in his
underpants. [Remember earlier in the season when there was a span of
several consecutive weeks where this guy was always in his underwear?]

Mannequin Manslaughter: Retail salespeople (Debra
Wilson, Mo Collins) are wary of a slasher (Michael McDonald) who
has been carrying out his attacks in shopping malls. He disguises
himself as a mannequin and freezes every time the salespeople look
at him. They don't notice that anything is amiss, even though he's in a
different place every time they turn around to face him. Finally, the
second salesperson (Collins) leaves, leaving Wilson alone with the killer.
She stabs a cop who was trying to apprehend the killer, and then as she
is calling the police, the killer closes in on her. This was not
the greatest sketch the show has ever done - in fact, it's basically
five minutes of seeing the psycho guy slowly skulk around the store.
This was probably the weakest segment in the show. But the writers
deserve some credit for trying something which is pretty much unlike
anything ever done on "Mad TV" before.

Q-Tip: Another musical guest. I won't even try to evaluate this
segment, since the closest I come to listening to rap is Kid Rock.
Interesting is that they seem to be having a musical guest every week
now, at least for February sweeps.

Mario: Mario (Nelson Ascencio) is some loser guy who
has a romantic dinner with his pretend girlfriend. The climax of
the sketch - literally - is when Mario receives oral sex from his
pretend girlfriend, while everyone in the restaurant watches. [Which
would be more embarassing - getting caught comitting an illicit sex
act in public, or getting caught pretending to commit an illicit
sex act in public?] This sketch was OK; it was not the funniest
sketch but it certainly had it's moments.

Closing Segment: Aries Spears says goodbye. This was OK.
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MD-516 was a relatively strong show, marred only by one or two weak
segments and the complete absence of Nicole Sullivan (not to mention
Phil LaMarr). As a "Mad TV" fan, I would hope that she is on the
show more, but as a Nicole Sullivan fan, I would rather see her move
on to bigger and better things, and if this new project takes off,
her time away from the set of "Mad TV" will be time well-spent. I am
not completely sold on Nelson Ascencio yet, but I don't think any
of the season two replacements won me over that quickly either. The
material has been somewhat better these last few weeks (it's
also February sweeps - coincidence?), and the producers
have thrown some of the show's limited budget back into production,
as witnessed by the set for the "Millionaire" parody. So take a bow,
boys (and girls) - you've earned it. (6/10)


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