Review of 11-13-1999 episode (MD-508; some spoilers)

As always, this review can also be found at:

        http://www.nic.com/~dzien/nicolesullivan/md508.txt

==========================================================================
Fight Like a Girl Club: Whatever you do, don't drop the soap. This is
a movie parody featuring movie stars like Brad Pitt (Pat Kilbane),
Edward Norton (Michael McDonald). Surrounded by other members of the club,
they flail away at each other while saying such things as "Owww!" and
"You hurt my eye!" As a movie parody, this is definitely low budget; the
entire segment takes place on one set. The basic premise isn't much,
either: the writers are saying that Pitt and Norton fight like girls.
I did not find this segment that humorous; Kilbane didn't seem to look
very much like Pitt, either. And yet as an opening segment it's probably
better than about eighty percent of the ones from seasons four and five,
and having actual comedic segments like this rather than just having a
cast member (or a cast member dressed like a recurring character) for
the opening segment would be a welcome change. The only element missing
from the old show openings now is the "You are now watching Mad TV" jingle
they used in seasons one through three - although given the sorry state
of the show in more recent times, perhaps this is a good strategem, since
some people might start watching by accident, not knowing what show it is.

Who Wants To Be a Millionaire I: Regis Philbin (Alex Borstein) hosts ABC's
hit game show. The contestant is Lorraine (Mo Collins); of course she's
more concerned about trivia like what the chair is made of than actually
answering the question (The question is "What does a doorknob open?" -
not too far off from the easier questions on this show). And there are
no time limits, so there is seemingly no limit to the extent to which the
maundering Lorraine can annoy Philbin. I did not find this parody that
funny; it probably would have been funnier if they came up with a new
character for the contestant rather than putting Lorraine on the show
and having her do her shtick. But Borstein's Philbin was definitely funny;
when she came out at the beginning of the segment in drag, I laughed
harder than I did at any time in the rest of the segment.

Who Wants To Be a Millionaire II: This time, Lorraine uses one of her
lifelines to call her husband, who thinks Philbin wants to talk to
Lorraine, and starts looking for her even though she's obviously not
in the house. This was funny, as was the idea of someone wasting one
of their lifelines on such an easy question. [I think once on the
real show someone used one of their lifelines to answer a question
about the Gulf War; it's somewhat surprising that seemingly intelligent
people would not know about the biggest news story of 1991.] This was OK.

Reality Check: This is a BET show hosted by two corpulent black women (Aries
Spears, Debra Wilson). They give commentary on the news, and then they
talk with their guest Martha Stewart (Mo Collins). Of course they insult
Stewart and call her a skinny white woman who can't cook. The Martha
Stewart impression was pretty good - this has been done by several
different actresses on "Saturday Night Live," and Collins' Stewart is
at least as good as any of them. Other than that, in my opinion this
segment falls somewhat flat; many people have probably run into people
that are like the characters in this segment, but it didn't resonate with
me. Perhaps the funniest part is where the announcer states "You're
watching the BET Network - providing quality, intelligent television
for the African American community" - as if "Benson" reruns qualify
as "quality, intelligent television." And then of course we get the
irony of the sponsorship by "Crazy Horse Malt Liquor" - suggesting
perhaps that the BET Network is in collusion with the purported "white
devils" who sell liquor in the black community.

The Reading Caboose: Two ex-reporters (Michael McDonald, Nicole Sullivan)
host a program which ostensibly helps kids learn how to read, but is
really a vehicle by which the reporters pander their conspiracy theories
about the Kennedy assassination. And since the there are only small
children on the show, they can't really challenge the reporters,
although one tries to, explaining that his father said that only
crackpots would want to explore unfounded theories - and Miss Lucy (Sullvian)
retorts that his father is a pig. What is really funny here is that
the reporters are as dogmatic in insisting that their conspiracy theory
is the truth as the government is in insisting that Oswald acted alone.
Plus we get the disclaimer at the beginning of the show, saying that
PBS does not necessarily endorse the opinions expressed on the show.
This was the second-best segment of the show in my opinion.

UBS Guy: The UBS Guy runs into Mitch Pileggi (from "The X Files") at a
restaurant, and of course he wastes no time in annoying him. Acting
out his frustration, Pileggi assaults the UBS Guy, and half a dozen of the
restaurant patrons and waiters pull out cameras to catch the moment. This
was the first appearance of the UBS Guy this season, and like many
of the more enjoyable recurring characters, this one is not overutilized;
the sketch wasn't as good in my opinion as the Super Bowl sketch from
MD-211 - which I rank as the all-time best UBS Guy sketch - but there
are some very funny moments here, with the UBS Guy at first refusing to
acknowledge that Pileggi is on "The X-Files" and then returning and
saying "You're that guy from the X-Files!" Also there is the irony of
Pileggi bending over backwards to be nice to Jaq, only to lose his temper
when Jaq refers to Pileggi as "Scully." Not A-list material perhaps, but
still a good use of a celebrity cameo.

Who Wants To Be a Millionaire III: Now Philbin is smoking a cigarette,
while Lorraine still plays with the chair. Finally, she says the word
"door" (the answer to the question) and Philbin collapses onto the floor.
Lorraine starts playing with his chair. This was OK; not brilliant stuff
but adequate.

Wedding Night: A couple (Nicole Sullivan, Michael McDonald)
who have waited until their wedding night to lose their virginity are
about to consummate their marriage. The husband moves about spasmodically
and makes wierd noises while slapping his own butt and pinching his
nipples, then explains to his new wife that this is what
people do in bed. I note that for the second week in a row we have
been subjected to seeing Michael McDonald in his underpants. What is
funny about this sketch, of course, is that the wife believes him (not
having anything to compare it to, I suppose, would make her more likely
to believe him, but one would think she's read books or something). The
physical humor was funny to a certain extent, but it's hard to see why
the creative forces behind the show insist on forcing us to see this
guy in various states of undress so often [if any of them are reading this,
please stop it as some of us like to eat while watching the show]. In
spite of this, the sketch was not quite ruined; in fact the ending, with
McDonald apparently achieving orgasm and then going to bed was rather
funny.


Inside the Actor's Studio: A pedantic, prolix, and pretentious man
(Will Sasso) hosts a show in which Andie McDowell (Mo Collins) is the
guest. The studio audience is a sparse smattering of acting students -
apparently not many people want to take this guy's class - and one
can see why, since he doesn't let McDowell speak, and then ruminates
on his experiences with famous actors, making the most mundane things
(e.g. that Andie McDowell liked Snickers blitzes) sound as if they
are noteworthy and important. The impression of McDowell mainly consists
of mispronouncing the word "didn't." I don't know if the writers had
a specific person in mind when they concocted Sasso's character, but
there are probably a lot of name droppers like that in the acting
world, so the parody can't be too far off the mark. I found the segment
enjoyable if not overly funny.

Artie Lange Returns: At the beginning of the segment, we see the first
two minutes of "Babewatch," the Baywatch/Babe crossover, then the
camera pans out to Mo Collins watching the segment on a TV monitor and
laughing. Artie Lange (the first of the original cast members to leave
the show) approaches her and begins to tell his sad tale about how
his life has gone downhill since the filming of "Babewatch." The three
remaining original cast members arrive, and he continues his tale of
woe. Funniest line: Artie Lange admonishes the other cast members that
if you're going to do coke in this town, don't do it it front of a
cop while taking a swing at his fruity partner. Whatever else is said
about Lange, there is no denying that he has the ability to make an
audience laugh (shades of the masturbation monologue from MD-101
come through here), and it's enough to make this segment the funniest
in the show in my opinion. His departure was a great loss to the show,
and this segment is enough to make me want to make enough time in my busy
schedule to watch his current project as a supporting cast member of
"The Norm Show."
==========================================================================
MD-508 was uneven at points but overall we got a fairly solid show, on
par with or slightly better than most of the shows this year. The show
definitely got a boost from the Artie Lange segment, although there were
other good segments like "The Reading Caboose." Perhaps the best thing about
this show was what it didn't include: most of the recurring characters
that many people find really annoying (like Stuart) weren't represented
here. And the Artie Lange segment, while funny, seems to underscore
the extent to which the new cast has failed to match the high standard
set by the original cast. But still a good show. (6/10)


=====================================================================
Number Six	| http://www.nic.com/~dzien/nicolesullivan/
dzien@nic.com	| (The Unofficial Nicole Sullivan Tribute Page)
=====================================================================